Stick It

Stick It

Do you hear that sound? No? You wanna know why you don't hear anything? It's because that's the sound of no hands clapping. And no hands are clapping for a very good reason. Because NOBODY CARES! Nobody cares if your goofy kid is on the honor roll at Podunk Middle School. Or if one of your precious darlings plays field hockey at Schmuckville Regional High School. You're proud of your kids? Great! Tell THEM that you're proud of them. You don't need to tell everyone who is unlucky enough to be within spitting distance of the rear bumper of your pathetic minivan. You love your Shih Tzu? Guess what. I don't give a Shih Tzu. Want me to ask you about your grandkids? Okay. Have they all won a Nobel Prize? No? Then zip it. I don't want to hear about them. And I don't want to hear about Obama trying to take your guns away, or how you feel about abortion, or who your favorite sports team is, or that you're for everyone coexisting or not coexisting or existing period. How about just using your turn signal when you're supposed to and not leaving it on for seven miles straight? You think you could manage that? Now that would truly be something to be proud of.