Washington And The Truth

comic about Washington and the truth

Washington And The Truth

It goes without saying that a lot of the stories about our founding fathers and our presidents are apocryphal. Not only that, many of them are not even true. The father of our country accounted for his fair share of legends and fascinating stories, but he was certainly not alone in this area. For instance, it is widely believed that Benjamin Franklin flew a kite with a metal key attached to the string during a thunderstorm, and that lightning struck the key, and he therefore discovered electricity. Well, that's not quite accurate. What actually happened was ole Benjy was pretty loaded that particular night, having been tavern-hopping for several hours with some local patriots, as well as some ladies of the evening who liked to party. And I'm not talking about tea parties. Anyway, Benny boy was running around outside in the storm, au naturel, as his buddies in France would say, when he literally got the shock of his life. Apparently the key in question was not dangling from a kite string, but rather from Dr. Franklin's... minute man? His rocket's red glare? His founding phallus? The reasons for this odd predicament remain clouded in mystery. My guess is that he had somehow misplaced his clothing and did not want to do the same with his house key, so he attached it somewhere where he was sure to find it. Luckily for our country, and indeed the world, he somehow survived this inadvertent but successful scientific experiment, and went on to accomplish many more great things in his long life. So remember, a penny saved is a penny earned; early to bed, early to rise, makes a man healthy, wealthy and wise. And, oh yeah, if you're going to run around naked outside in the rain, for your own safety and the safety of others, make sure you wear your rubbers.